Rider Prophet Salutes US Expansion: Miami Manatees

Today we wrap up our salute to US Expansion with a look at the worst CFL team that never was. 

The idea for a team in Miami came up prior to the 1995 season. Plans were made to purchase the Las Vegas Posse… or at least their tattered remains… and launch the Miami Manatees in time for 1996 season.

They even staged an exhibition game at the Orange Bowl between Birmingham and Baltimore to introduce the Canadian game to Florida. The game was very poorly attended. While there were likely many factors that led to this, one major factor may have been the fact that Miami football fans found it hard to take a match up between two teams called the Cudas and the CFLers, seriously.  

Years in the League: None, thank goodness

Overall Record: n/a

Notable Players: Gamzo (an actual manatee that was adopted in honour of the team)

The Good

- Thankfully the CFL dodged a bullet and never had to associate itself with a team called the Manatees.

- As if that logo isn’t awesome.

The Bad

- The name Manatees. Also known as the sea cow. While it may be an intimidating moniker when you are talking about an overweight woman, it definitely isn’t when talking about a football team… unless it was a football team of overweight women.

- A portion of ticket sales for the team was to be donated to save the manatees. While I’m all for teams and players supporting charities and the community, I’ll be damned if I’ll respect a team that supports dirty hippies and their stupid causes. It also makes no sense since I doubt the hippies that care about saving the manatees more than they care about personal hygiene even watch football. From a marketing perspective you would have had more success donating proceeds to causes like “punch the manatees” or “nuke the whales”. Now that’s something I would support!

 

Fate

League suspended US operations in 1995 so the plans never came to fruition. The Manatees were banished the footnotes of CFL history.

Video Evidence

There's this...

This hilarious song about manatees....

Or this...

 

Rider Prophet Salutes US Expansion: Birmingham Barracudas

The year was 1995, the CFL was looking for additional American franchises to add to its US expansion efforts. Along came a Georgia business man by the name of Art Williams wanting to put a franchise in Birmingham. And who did he name as the GM of his new franchise? … None other than Roy Shivers.

 

Years in the League: 1995

Overall Record: 11-7

Notable Players: QB Matt Dunnigan, DB Eddie Davis, DL Anthony Drawhorn, WR Jason Phillips, OL Fred Childress. Roy Shivers.

The Good

- Winning record and a playoff appearance.

- Dunnigan had his best season ever

- Attendance started out very good… well at least until college football season started at which point it plummeted.

The Bad

- The nickname Cudas. Owner wanted a team name that would “scare the spit out of people”… I somehow doubt much saliva was lost due the name Cudas.

- Like the Memphis Mad Dogs they decided to buck the trend when it came to jerseys and put a logo on the front. Now that design is bad enough before you factor in the lovely colour scheme the Cudas had going for them.

- The owner openly criticized the Canadian rules and favoured chancing things to be more like the NFL… this included changing the name of the league. If only there were some option for people who want 4 down football on a small field with 11 players and not called the CFL.

- Brought Reggie Slack into the league

Fate

Tried moving the team to Shreveport following the 1995 season but the CFL ended up ceasing US operations completely so the team folded.

Video Evidence

Rider Prophet Salutes US Expansion: San Antonio Texans

San Antonio was originally supposed to join the league along with Sacramento in 1993 but the owner ran out of money before the team could even get close to the field. This was the result of the owner (though I use the term loosely since he really didn’t “own” anything) at the time was an idiot and had nothing to do with San Antonio which was still seen as a good market for football.

So following the 1994 season when the Sacramento Gold Miners were looking for a new home, the league decided to give a competent owner as shot a San Antonio-based franchise. 

Years in the League: 1995

Overall Record: 12 - 6

Notable Players: QB David Archer, DB Malcolm Frank, QB Jimmy Kemp

The Good

-  Only US expansion team to have a field big enough to actually have the right dimensions for the Canadian game.

- Second highest scoring offense in the league in 1995

The Bad

- Not much really. Unlike the other teams they had decent ownership and talent on their roster though attendance was decent at best.

Fate:

Following the 1995 season the CFL was prepared to purge itself of the crappy US franchises, namely everyone but Baltimore and San Antonio. The plan to keep the Texans and Stallions hit a major snag when Baltimore got chased out of town by the NFL. That would have left San Antonio as the only US team in the league.  Rather then go at it alone, it was decided that the Texans would fold, ending the US experiment once and for all.

Video Evidence:

Rider Prophet Salutes US Expansion: Memphis Mad Dogs

What do you do when the NFL turns you down? You talk to the CFL. That’s exactly what Fred Smith did when the NFL didn’t go for his proposed Memphis Hound Dogs. 

Years in the League: 1995

Overall Record: 9-9

Notable Players: QB Damon Allen, DL Anthony Drawhorn, WR Jason Phillips, K Donald Igwebuike, WR Eddie Brown, DL Tim Cofield, DL Rodney Harding

 

The Good

- Had a good defense. Though that may be in large part due to the fact that their home field was not CFL regulation size (it was even smaller than the other US fields that were not regulation size) so it was easier to defend. 

The Bad

- As mentioned above their field was tiny by CFL standards and this was despite the fact that they widened the field with Astroturf… which was odd given that the rest of the field was grass. 

- They were the league worst in points scored during their only season

- Decided to mess with the standard format of football jerseys... the results were not very visually appealing

Fate: Folded following the 1995 season along with the rest of the remaining US teams.

Video Evidence

Here's a clip of the Mad Dogs against our beloved Riders

 

Rider Prophet Salutes US Expansion: Baltimore Stallions

There is an old saying that if you throw enough shit at a wall, something is bound to stick. That was certainly true of the Baltimore Stallions. While their US expansion counterparts seemed to be doing everything wrong, in Baltimore everything came together and for once worked out extremely well.

Baltimore was full of football fans but had been without a team since 1983 when their beloved Colts packed their bags and headed to Indianapolis.  The combination of a strong football market, a good venue and solid ownership put Baltimore on strong footing from day one. Though even the strongest of the US teams had its share of idiocy.

Years in the League: 1994 – 1995

Overall Record: 27 – 9

Notable Players: QB Tracy Ham, RB Mike Pringle, LB OJ Brigance, DL Jerald Baylis, DL Elfrid Payton.

The Good

- Unlike the other US franchises, Baltimore wisely decided on a GM and Head Coach with a wealth of CFL experience in Jim Popp and Don Matthews.

- The combination of a strong front office and a talent laden roster instantly made them a success on the field. They were the most successful of all the US expansion teams by far (not that that is saying much).

- Averaged over 30,000 fans per game

- Appeared in the Grey Cup in both their seasons and became the first and only US team to win the Grey Cup when they defeated the Stampeders in 1995 here at Taylor Field.

The Bad

The comedy of errors surrounding the team name. They originally wanted to be called the Baltimore Colts to play off the old NFL franchise. Not surprisingly, the NFL took some issue with the team being called the Colts and launched legal action. And when the deep pocketed corporate giant that is the NFL takes on their cash strapped little cousin to the north in court, who do you think won? That’s right the NFL prevailed and Baltimore could no longer be called the Colts.

This left the franchise flabbergasted. If they couldn’t use Colts, what could they do?!? If only there was some other term for a horse they could use instead! Alas no one involved with the franchise seemed to own a thesaurus or know anything about horses so they opted to go forward as the Baltimore CFLers.  An awe inspiring team name if there ever was one.

Eventually someone realized that Stallions could be substituted for Colts with relative ease and the Baltimore Stallions finally had a name. I always found it funny how long it took them to figure this out since I was 11 at the time and remember thinking aloud “Why not just use Stallions instead?” Though that may or may not have been a direct result of the influence of Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure. Wyld Stallyns!!

Fate

After the 1995 season, the CFL started to disband most of its US teams. However, due their strong performance both on and off the field, the Stallions were poised to make the cut and survive… that was until the NFL announced that Baltimore would finally be receiving another NFL franchise (I suspect the CFL’s success in the city played some role in their decision). Owner Jim Speros was smart enough to realize that no matter how popular the Stallions were, there was no way they could compete head to head with the Ravens despite his best efforts. The team ended up moving to Montreal to become the Alouettes.

Video Evidence
Here's a clip from the 1995 Grey Cup here in Regina.

 

Rider Prophet Salutes US Expansion: Las Vegas Posse

 What town has a large population but no pro sports team? Las Vegas

And where to people go when they are looking for entertainment? Las Vegas

And where is there more money than people know what to do with? Las Vegas

It seemed so simple. The only thing lacking in Vegas (other than morals) was a pro sports team. This narrow minded reasoning of course omits the long list of reasons why Vegas is a terrible place for a sports team and why none of the major US based sports league set up shop in Vegas. But all this was of no concern to Nick Miletti who became the owner of a CFL expansion team from Sin City in time for the 1994 CFL season.

Years in the League: 1994

Overall Record: 5 - 13

Notable Players: QB Anthony Calvillo, DL Shonte Peoples, WR Curtis Mayfield, KR Tamarick Vanover, RB Jon Volpe, LB Greg Battle, K Carlos Huerta

The Good

- Introduced the CFL to future Hall of Famer Anthony Calvillo

- Historical comedic value

The Bad

- Pretty much everything not covered in “The Good”

- Failed to consider the possibility of it being really, really, really hot in Las Vegas when deciding to play football at an outdoor stadium in July and August.

- They practiced on a casino parking lot that was converted into a practice field… which was only 70 yards long.

- Their mascot was 8 men on horseback called “The Eight Horsemen”… take 8 live horses, add the sweltering Nevada heat and you get a pungent odour that is more suitable for a feedlot than the sidelines of a football field.

- The Posse had a scantily clad group of cheerleaders called the “Showgirls”. At times Posse head coach had them loiter behind their opponents’ bench in an attempt to distract them.

- During their debut game in the CFL, their kick returner (Tamarick Vanover) called for a fair catch while the ball was in the air and headed for the sidelines. Meanwhile the BC Lion players (who actually knew the Canadian rules) jumped on the loose ball in the endzone for one of the easiest TDs ever scored. Later that same game Vanover caught a punt on his own 10 yard line and ran back into his own endzone and out the back thinking he was conceding a single. Again, the BC players (who knew the Canadian rules) celebrated one of the easiest safeties ever scored.

- This… 

- Averaged under 9000 fans per game.

- Only 2350 people showed up to their second last home game against the Blue Bombers and a large portion of that was a contingent who made the trip from Winnipeg. That game is now etched in the record book as the lowest attendance in league history.

- Their final home had to be moved to Edmonton because ticket sales were so bad.

Fate

Mercifully folded after the gong show that was their inaugural season.

Video Evidence

Here's a clip of Anthony Calvillo from his Posse days... he fumbles and Doug Flutie proceeds to score in 2 easy plays. Sadly, it was the least embarrassing clip of the Posse I could find. The other option was one of Anthony Calvillo injury knee on the first play of the game.

 

Rider Prophet Salutes US Expansion: Shreveport Pirates

The year was 1994 and Bernie Glieberman needed something to occupy his time between running the soon to be defunct Ottawa Rough Riders into the ground and running the not yet operation but soon to be defunct nonetheless Ottawa Renegades into the ground. 

Gleiberman was the owner of the Rough Riders at the time and determined that the reason his team was so bad had nothing to do with his ownership or the ridiculous decisions made by his son Lonnie. No, clearly the Rough Riders’ problems were the result of the team being in Ottawa and not somewhere in the States and so he told the league he wanted to move the team south. The CFL did not want to see the end of one of the most storied franchises in the leagues history (little did they know it was pretty much inevitable) so they ended up cutting a deal with Glieberman whereby the Gliebermans got an expansion team in Shreveport and got to take players with him while a new ownership group got the scorched remains of the Rough Riders (name, logos, colours, history). 

Years in the League: 1994 – 1995

Overall Record: 8 - 28

Notable Players: John Heidenreich (who went on to become a successful professional wrestler), K Bjorn Kittmo, DL Joe Montford, DL Elfrid Payton, OL Uzooma Okeke, WR Curtis Mayfield 

The Good

- umm… err… they somehow managed to stay in the league for 2 whole years.

The Bad

- The team hired John Huard as their head coach only to fire him during their inaugural training camp.

- During training camp, the players were housed on the second floor of a livestock barn.

- They only managed 8 wins over 2 seasons making them the least successful expansion team ever.

- “The Great Tucker Caper” – By the end of 1995 Glieberman owed the city of Shreveport a lot of money so they tried to seize is vintage 1948 Tucker as a result. Glieberman’s lawyer tried to skip town in the car and hide it but ran out of gas and was picked up by the police before he could complete his mission.

Fate

Team folded following the 1995 season.

Video Evidence

Note how full the stands are throughout

 

Rider Prophet Salutes US Expansion

Much like budding flowers and chirping birds have become a symbol of spring, a Rider Prophet Salute has become the official sign of a slow offseason. 

As part of my ongoing efforts to entertain you the reader and fill this blog with content (though not necessarily prioritized in that order), I have presented salutes to things such as bad team names and bad jerseys. Well as the 2011 offseason rolls on and actual news becomes scarcer and scarcer its time for a new salute. This time we will be looking back and saluting a part of the CFL’s long a storied history… a part they’d probably prefer be stricken from the record.

It was dark time for the CFL. Their financial papers had more red ink than a communist tattoo parlour (if such a thing existed).  In their desperation the league came up with the idea of expanding the league to include some American franchises. The franchise fees that the teams would have to pay would inject some much needed cash into the CFL. While I’m sure nobody involved thought that US expansion was an ideal solution for Canadian football, I don’t think anyone involved imagined the hilarious lows that this escapade would lead to. 

So sit back and enjoy as we take a stroll down memory lane as the Rider Prophet Salutes US Expansion.

Rider Prophet Salutes US Expansion: Sacramento Gold Miners

In 1993, Sacramento became the first American team to join the CFL. They were actually supposed to be one of 2 teams (the other being the San Antonio) to join the League in 1993 but the latter folded before it even really got started when the owner ran out of money (a telling omen of how the whole US expansion thing would go). The Gold Miners came from the remnants of the Sacramento Surge of the World League of American Football.

Years in the League: 1993 – 1994

Overall Record: 15-20-1

Notable Players: QB David Archer (that Rider-hating SOB), WR Rod Harris, DT George Bethune, RB Mike Pringle, RB Mike Oliphant, QB Kerwin Bell

 

The Good

- They forever etched themselves in the CFL record books by becoming the first American team to defeat a Canadian team… by beating the Saskatchewan Roughriders (pauses to silently shake head in disgust).

- They had some decent talent on their team and showed signs of improvement over their 2 years

The Bad

- Their “stadium” sucked. Most of the seating was grandstands and the closest thing to amenities provided were port-a-potties

- Attendance. They had to give away close to 2000 a game to make the crowds look more respectable… you know relatively thinking.

Fate

The team relocated to San Antonio following the 1994 season.

Video Evidence:

Here's a clip of a '94 match-up against the Stamps.