Thursday, April 16, 2009

Rider Prophet Salutes Bad Team Names: Really?

Due to underwhelming demand here’s some more teams that should have thought twice about their name…

Top 5 - Maybe You Should Have Gone With An Animal (Take 2)

5. Philadelphia Soul (AFL) – About the only way to salvage this team name would be if their logo/mascot was the Soul Pole from Dazed and Confused.

4. Detroit Drive (defunct AFL) – Anyone else see the irony in a sports team whose name is meant to be a tie in to the auto industry now being defunct? Guess their bailout never came through.

3. Richmond Speed (defunct AF2) – Let this be a lesson to you that naming a sports team after a Keanu Reeves movie is a bad idea. There’s just no room in this world for the Replacements, the Constantines, the Hard Balls or the Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventurers … check that, both Hard Balls and Excellent Adventurers would be awesome team names!

2. Amarillo Dusters (AF2) – Oh no! I’m so scared of a team who could use a swiffer as a mascot. You suck Amarillo!

Winner: Nashville Sounds (AAA Baseball) –

This is perhaps the vaguest team name I’ve come across. I mean Sounds covers a lot of ground… and none of it is good ground. What sounds are they referring too? The sound of people’s mockery? The sound of every former member of the Grand Ole Opry turning over in their grave due to this team’s pitiful attempt to tie into Nashville’s famous music scene? The sound their own fan(s) booing their sorry excuse for a team name? Or the sound of tumbleweeds blowing through their park because no one is willing to publicly associate themselves with the team?

Dishonourable Mentions: Boise Burn (AF2), Laredo Law (defunct AF2) – Interesting to note that aside from the winner, this category was dominated by AFL and AF2.


CK said...

Why does the Boise Burn sound like it might be affiliated with the Cleveland Steamers?

Rider Prophet said...


Actually Boise Burn is caused by Southern Maryland Blue Crabs... who will be appearing in an upcoming salute.