Official Prophecies 2013

Twas just days before the season and the province was pumped up

Even more so than normal since we’re hosting the Cup

Expectations were high, only the best will do

Fortunately those standards don’t apply to me too

Where normally these rhymes just roll off my tongue

This year I’m struggling to even write one

But the show must go on for on me, you rely

So I’ll do it with the aid of my old friend rye

So bear with me as I prophecy on the White & Green

With my thoughts and predictions for 2013

Taman had loaded the roster, he’s gone all in

To hell with the cap, all we need is a win

In Foley, In Rey, in Weldon and Chick

In Simon, in Anderson… I still think he’s a dick

But for all the big names in our offseason haul

George Cortez will end up as the biggest of all

He will take our average O and make it scary

One of the top Os will be here on the prairie

Dressler and Sheets will be tops yet again

But Getz, Taj and Jock will join also the train

As for Simon he’ll be ok but here’s my guess

He’ll end up playing eleven games or less.

Bagg will play more and that I know is bold

And Darian will be back to the Durant of old

Through the air, on the ground he will score

Not just barely squeaking but points galore

On D we’ve completely changed front to back

Moved up Butler and moved back Brack

That experiment will be short lived, gone by midseason

They’ll be back in their old spots and with good reason.

The D will be aggressive and attack the O

FU Richie’s softness, this is the Chamblin show.

We’ll get lots more picks, but give up more yards

High risk, high reward is what’s in the cards.

Our aggressiveness will start down in the trenches

We’ll send a few QBs back to the benches

Chick will be a monster but won’t lead in sacks

Others will benefit from his relentless attacks

With Shologan and Foley our DL will be top rate

And George (once he’s served his game for headbutting Tate)

They will give up more but be fun to watch

Though at times they will make you want to shoot scotch

We will start with 2 quick wins and Riderville will have it made

Spots will be picked out for the inevitable parade

But the initial elation won’t last long

We will lose a few and things will start to go wrong

A high profile injury, struggles on both sides of the ball

Bench Durant! Fire Chamblin! Axe Hall!

These will be the cries of the midseason freakout

But patience will prevail and some wins we will sneak out.

At a game above 500 come Labour Day we’ll be stuck

Not sure who the Bomber QB will be but it won’t be Buck

Yet another sweep of Winnipeg will ensue

The bandwagon will fill up again as if right on cue

We’ll be strong down the stretch as things start to gel

Sadly part of this will be the return of Neufeld

Killed me to write that and you know what I’m meanin’

But he’s at least better than Heenan

At 11 and 7 we will land at second place

A home playoff game at Mosaic and the Stamps we will face

That loser Tate won’t be the starter any more

Either Glenn or Bo Levi hick-name will face the Mosaic roar

Game will be close and cause some heart attacks

We will win in the last few seconds thanks to some sacks

Then its off to BC just one win away

From a dream home Grey Cup the next Sunday

But because we are Riders and generally cursed

We will have yet more sadness that needs to be nursed

For the Lions will prevail in a real close game

We’ll leave it all on the field and have no shame

But a 4^th cup for Rider Nation will just have wait

Until 2014 when we will truly be great

So there’s my predictions but fear not if you don’t like

For in 5 years I’ve yet to be 100% right

So you’ll hear me exclaim to you my friend

Let’s hope I’m wrong about the end