Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Tis’ the Season

Can you believe that Christmas is only 2 weeks away? If you're like me this means that you've only now started to think about what to get the people on your Christmas list and you'll hopefully get around to actually buying the gifts next week sometime. This will no doubt involve running a half marathon to get from your parking spot to the store, fighting your way though crowds of hapless shoppers who are there just to browse and waiting in line so long that you grow a beard that would rival mine. Don't you just love Christmas?

Here's a holiday shopping tip from the Rider Prophet to help you avoid the stresses of Christmas shopping: Wal-Mart is open 24 hours now. Tell your friends and family to only include items on their wish list that can be purchased at Wal-Mart at 3am. Or if you want a unique gift idea... autographed Rider Prophet pictures are available for a reasonable rate.

Of course if you have Rider fans on your list, shopping is easier this year than the rest of the Patriots’ schedule. In addition to all the regular Rider paraphernalia (which is all of a sudden cool again), the new line of Grey Cup gear is also out. Rider gear is flying off the shelves faster than a Crown Corporation at a SaskParty yard sale. You could slap a Rider logo on pretty much anything these days and make some money.

With that in mind I came up with my Top 10 list of new products I would like to see the Riders start selling...

10) Eric Tillman Chia Pet
9) Jamie Boreham action figure - complete with Juggernaut costume
8) John Chick home blood sugar tester
7) T-shirt that says "If Gainer doesn't wear pants, why should I?"
6) Talking Mike Abou-Mechrek doll
5) Norm Fong weight loss system
4) Luca Congi disappearing All-Star award
3) T-shirt that says "I stood in the Mosaic parking lot overnight and all
I got was cold"
2) Chris Szarka three fingered glove
1) Austin Mini - refurbished, still some dents.

If you have an idea for Rider merchandise, post it in the comments and I'll be sure to steal the idea and pass it off as my own. Until then, happy shopping Rider fans.

Oh and by the way... the Riders have re-signed Wayne Smith and Wes Cates (I figure my blog should contain at least trace amounts of actual news).


Anonymous said...

Here's a couple honourable mentions that didn't quite make the top 10 (courtesy of Media Consultant)

- "Whole World Green" paint
- Kennedy Nkeyasen jersey - number sold separately, and not to you

Anonymous said...

This one's for you prophet, Grey Cup aside, how about the James Johnson grill? Get that flame broiled taste at home.

Anonymous said...

I absolutely love it!! Though I would be worried that using the grill would lead to getting burned excessively.

How about the Henri Childs trick golf ball… it’s guaranteed to never hit the hole.