Eight Annual Rider Prophet Awards

It’s time for our yearly ceremony to honour the best and worst of this past CFL season. There will be no actual award show as per usual because, despite discussions with TSN, they informed me that they would be unable to spare any airtime as they had to ensure enough was available to simultaneously show replays of past games on 4 channels.

This year’s winners will receive an autographed picture of the Rider Prophet, a Pot of Gold box with that one chocolate left that no one wants to eat and tickets to an Oilers game (given their dreadful play and falling attendance, the team has concluded that giving me tickets to give away is the last resort before paying people to attend the game).

Now, on with the awards:

Best Player Name

Generally winners of this award fall into one of 2 categories: hilarious or difficult to pronounce. This year’s winner is the latter... Lirim Hajrullahu. Try saying that 5 times fast.

Previous winners: SirVincent Rogers, Drew Willy, Bear Woods, Solomon Elimimian, Craphonso Thorpe, Charleston Hughes, Chijioke Onyenegecha,

 

Quote of the Year

Honourable mention to Coach Chamblin for his interview at halftime during the Ottawa game but this year's winner is hands down Solomon Elimimian:

Previous Winner: Ed Hervey, Joe Mack, Henry Burris, Eddie Johnson, Jason Clermont, Mike Abou-Mechrek x 2

Play of the Year 

Normally this award goes to a play that is comical or embarrassing. This year though, I am changing it up and going with a play that caught everyone's attention in the Grey Cup. This hit was awesome!! unless you happened to be named Maver.

Botched Call of the Year

Oct 24 in a game between Ottawa and Montreal… Brandon London fumbled and Jovon Johnson recovered. The ruling was a fumble which the Als challenged. Command Centre overturned the call on the field and said no fumble… which prompted Rick Campbell to challenge (a Doug Berry-style: I challenge your challenge). 

The CFL later admitted they got it wrong (and given how little that happens it tells you how bad they botched it). I have grown used to the officials botching calls. But when the wrong call is made despite using video review that takes it to a whole new level.

Honourable mention to every time Dressler had a big punt return.

 

The Commercial I Didn’t Get Sick Of Seeing Even Though TSN Made Me Watch It 54,297 Times Award

It was a terrible year for ads. I blame the lack of a new Flex Seal ad to tell me what else can be made into a boat. The best of the bunch goes to Old Spice... briefcase taco.

 

Fans Choice Douche-Bag of the Year

Before we get to this year's winner, I would like to make special note of two time defending douche-bag Jon Cornish who finished tied for second in voting... despite not even being on the ballot. A true testament to just how big a douche bag you think he is. Rest assured this strong write in vote will ensure that Cornish is back on the ballot next year regardless of whether he does anything douchy.

Now to the winner...

You the fans have spoken and with 53% of the vote have name Chris Jones as your Fans' Choice Douche-Bag of the Year.

Now Jones has had a strong reputation for being an asshole for many years, but I think it was the whole snubbing of the national anthem that upgraded him from common asshole to award winning Douche-Bag.

Previous Winners: Jon Cornish x2, Henry Burris, Dwight Anderson, Mike Kelly, Jason Jimenez, Rob Murphy

Most Insulted Sports Figure

So many potential winners this year. There was the uselessness of Chaz Schillens, the idiocy of Eron Riley, the offensive play calling as a whole, the general Getzlaf-ness of Getzlaf, Dan Clark’s efforts to ensure all our QBs ended up in the infirmary, another miss for Milo, and I could go on. But this year I will change things up a bit and award this to a group of people instead of an individual. 

By a wide margin, the majority of my insults were directed at any Rider QB not named Durant. The combination of Sunseri/Doege/Joseph will be a leading reason I get called into the principal’s office someday to address Prophet Jr’s swearing. They made the Michael Bishop era seem not that bad by comparison.

 

Previous winners: Pat Neufeld, Chris Getzlaf, Ryan Dinwiddie, Jim Daley, Michael Bishop x 2, Marcel Bellefeuille

Friday Round-Up: Coaching Carousel

Just a quick reminder before we get started, the Rider Prophet Awards will be handed out on Monday so you only have a few more hours to get your vote in for the Fan’s Choice Douche Bag of the Year.

After a week where everything not related to the Grey Cup was kept quiet, the news came flowing fast a furious this week. The bulk of the news centered around coaching and the Riders are at the centre of a lot of it. Here’s what we know:

By all accounts outside of WR Coach Jason Tucker and OL Coach Doug Malone, all other assistant coaches are not expected to return next year (though we are still awaiting official word from the Riders). That includes OC George Cortez (who has been confirmed now), DC Richie Hall and ST/C Bob Dyce. I’m surprised at this move to clean house, I’m under no illusion that our coaches were without issue but we just won a Grey Cup and were 9-2 before our franchise QB went down. Seems to me, more of our issues relate to scouting deficiencies at QB, WR and MLB (something that even Taman admitted to) but that is a topic for another day.

Obviously I’m choked about the Cortez move. Had anyone seen my face 2 years ago when I found out we landed him it would have rivaled that of a kid on Christmas morning. I had an overt man crush on him. Clearly he had a litany of issues this season but when you look at his track record it’s tough to let someone of that calibre go. I get the sense Cortez ain’t always the easiest guy to work with (find me an old man that is) but this definitely a loss for the team. I’m not confident we will be able to replace him with anyone close to his calibre. Remember that his predecessor was Bob freakin’ Dyce. The rumoured list of potential replacements includes Paul LaPolice (who I’m not confident we land), Jacques Chapdelaine (who I’m not confident we want) and Khari Jones (who would be great as a QB coach but did little to impress in his first year as OC in BC).

The Richie Hall move doesn’t surprise me overall. But the timing is puzzling. I expected Chamblin to axe Richie when he first took charge. They have very different defensive philosophies and I expected Chamblin to opt for a DC who was more in line with his world view. But they have now co-existed for 3 years and our defense over that span has been a real strong point for the team. Not sure why make the move now? The "we are looking to see if we can find someone better" approach we are taking is one of the oddest things I've ever seen. Apparently Devone Claybrooks is at the top of Chamblin’s wish list as a replacement.

The Bob Dyce move is the one I care least about. He was a sub-par receivers coach, a sub-par OC, looked good as ST/C last year but terrible this year (though to be fair the bulk of his Canadian starters on specials teams got hurt which had to be a factor). Word is Dyce is being considered for the Head Coach of the U of R Rams.

In other coaching news:

-          The candidate list for the vacant BC Head Coach position is said to include LaPolice, Charlie Taffe, Jeff Garcia and Orlando Steinhauer. Reports also suggests Buono’s preference would be for an offensive minded coach.  

-          Jason Maas has been named the OC of the RedBlacks 

-          John Hufnagel will remain HC for next season and Dave Dickenson will take over as HC in 2016. Also word is Marc Mueller while remain on the coaching staff but move to the offensive coaching side.

NFL Watch

Shawn Lemon – Has workouts scheduled with Seattle, Washington, Denver and at least 9 other teams.

Brett Jones – At least 9 teams have expressed interest in the League’s Top Lineman

Duron Carter – Has a workout with the Cleveland Browns and interest from a number of other teams. Simply put if your hall of fame dad can’t get you a shot down south after his performance up here, you should just give up on the NFL dream forever.

Delvin Breaux – Reportedly garnering a ton of NFL interest

CFL Ins and Outs

BC

Out: DB Dante Marsh, DL Khalif Mitchell, P Ricky Schmitt, LB Jamal Johnson (option year not exercised by team)

Also, Buono announced that they will not be making an offer to pending FA Kevin Glenn… which is a bold strategy given Lulay’s bum shoulder and the total lack of experience in Beck and Partridge. My only hope is that Glenn lands in either Edmonton or Montreal so the dream of him hitting for the CFL cycle stays alive.

Winnipeg

In: OL Pat Neufeld (contract extension)

If this is part of Winnipeg’s plan to fix the dreadful O-line then Drew Willy better start stocking up on pain killers now.

Toronto

In: DB Eric Black, OL Jas Dhillon (contract extension)

Montreal

In: LB Chip Cox (contract extension)

Monday Morning Sentimonies: Belated Grey Cup Edition

Sunday marked the end of the CFL as the Grey Cup was handed out... to the damn Stamps. I was just happy the game was exciting enough to hold my attention. Part way through the 1st half I was convinced that after the halftime show I would be switching to the NFL game but fortunately the Ti-Cats decided to mount a comeback and make it for an interesting second half and a dramatic finish. In no particualr order other than when the pop into my head, here are my thoughts on the game:

- Poor Hamilton fans. Embarrassed last year, heart broken this year. As someone whose sports team has inflicted a lot of pain on my heart over the years, I suggest numbing the pain with alcohol, a lot of it. I also suggest not driving or going to work while you take this prescription.

- Much like in '09, a last minute gaffe (which was defintely a penalty) will overshadow all the other ways that the rest of the team pissed that game away. Taylor Reed didn't let a FG kick get blocked. Reed wasn't responsible for a non-existant run game, Reed didn't fail to score from inside the 5 yard line, Reed didn't allow a sack on a 3 man rush with the game on the line. So yes he screwed up but the other 43 players are just a responsible for that loss.

- I get that after a massive return Brandon Banks likely needed to catch his breath. But with the championship on the line and under a minute left in the game how was he not out there? After one play off, Banks needs to suck it up princess and get on the field. To not have your most dangerous weapon on the field for the finals plays of the game is inexcusable.

- Bo Levi Mitchell is pretty freaking good! Scary to think that he's only 24 and in his first year as a starter.

- Dave Dickenson also deserves a ton of credit for a great game plan. Hamilton's big strength on D is their run D and Dickenson made it a non factor by attacking them through the air and using Cornish as a big decoy.

- The more I watch Brandon Stewart play, the more I think SJ Green was right about him.

- Stamps will have some decisions to make at receiver this offseason. They have McDaniel, Price, West, Fuller, Cunningham and now Rogers. Something as gotta give. A lot of speculation that the something will be Maurice Price. Makes sense as he would be the highest paid and has the durability of Buck Pierce.

- Bar none the highlight of the game was Hickman absolutely destroying Rob Maver and using Maver's battered corpse to knock out another Calgary cover guy. Holy crap!

- I wonder how much the League read the teams the riot act about not screwing up the individual player introductions? PS - Congrats to Rico Murray on not falling down this time.

- In Rider news, George Cortez in done as our OC and there are rumours that Richie Hall, Barron Miles and Bob Dyce may join him... I'll have more on that later in the week. Spoiler alert: I'm not as elated at the Cortez move as the rest of the world.

Thus ends another season of CFL action. Stick with me throughout the offseason as I will keep you up to date with all the goings on. For example, there are only 4 days left to vote for the Fans' Choice Douchebag of the Year. Chris Jones is in the lead but thanks to the strength of write-in votes, 2 time winner Jon Cornish is in contention for a 3-peat. Cast your vote today.