Wednesday, November 18, 2015

Vote In the Fan’s Choice Douche Bag of the Year Award


It will soon be time for the annual Rider Prophet Awards. The awards themselves are about as meaningful as the Rider nominee for top O-lineman but at least my awards are more entertaining than the so called “legitimate” awards.
By far the most popular of the Rider Prophet Awards is the Fans’ Choice Douche Bag of the Year which recognizes outstanding achievements in the field of douche baggery as chosen by you, the fans. Voting opens today so let your voice be heard and cast your vote.
This year’s nominees are:
Jamal Westermaan - Nominated for being fined 4 times in his first season in the CFL for questionable hits. The fact his wasn’t suspended is more a reflection on the sad state of discipline in the CFL than it is on his dirty play.
Rogers – Nominated for their complete and utter mistreatment of the Argos. It culminated when they claimed they did not have enough time between ball games to convert the field for the Argos… they had 5 days. I hope every Argo player took a dump in their locker when leaving Rogers Centre for the last time this season.

Corey Chamblin – There are many things I could point to for his nomination: his abysmal failure at fielding a competent defense; his habit for deflecting blame to pretty much everyone but himself in press conferences; after months of silence following his firing, that revisionist-history interview he gave where he claimed among other things that he was trying to make the team younger. But the reason I will personally choose for his nomination is for subjecting us all to Tino Sunseri as our quarterback. That has to be classified as a form of torture under some international treaty.
Jon Cornish – He did nothing particularly douchy this season but this is a fans’ choice award and at your request it’s now a rule that Cornish be a nominee every year. He was among the top contenders last year based purely on write in votes after being left off the ballot. This is democracy in action people… even if it’s in relation to a made up award whose purpose is to insult people.

Other – If you feel someone out there exceeds the levels of douche baggery of the above nominees and needs to be considered for this award feel free to vote “Other” and leave the name of your write in vote as a comment on one of the blog posts.

5 comments:

Christopher Evans said...

Roger's Centre - what an absolute joke of a landlord.

Chamblin - runner up - he was bragging at prior to the beginning of the year about how the Riders had 2 co-ordinators staffed with each phase of the ball and they would get it all figured out. Offence was decent most of the year; special teams was ok; defence didn't have a clue!

Cornish - second runner up - and winner of the Cheeseball Award! He says a lot about nothing... considering he's the self-proclaimed smartest guy in the CFL, I am still for him to say something intelligent!

Govind said...

I think Rogers is clearly the 2015 winner. However Cornish should be recognized in the lifetime achievement category.

Dan said...

I voted Chamblin because it impacted my team more than Rogers but Rogers truly are asses.

I laughed and laughed at your comment about the players taking a dump in the lockers before leaving. Rockstar stuff. Loved it!

Rider Prophet said...

Christopher - sound analysis

Gov - I'm totally stealing your idea on the lifetime achievement in the field of douchebaggery

Dan - Argo o linemen and d linemen could leave quite the "parting gift" if so inclined

Govind said...

I would consider it an honor to have you steal the lifetime achievement idea.